


Shut The Fuck Up And Help Me Find My Shitting Shoe

by CykaSpace



Category: Original Work
Genre: Crack, Gen, Strong Language, i wrote this at god knows what time, send help
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-29 00:43:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20073328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CykaSpace/pseuds/CykaSpace
Summary: sum sooper good shit I wrote at one in the morning





	Shut The Fuck Up And Help Me Find My Shitting Shoe

**Author's Note:**

> sum sooper good shit I wrote at one in the morning

_ **I can't find my fucking shoe.** _

_ **Where the shit is it?** _

_ **Nathan, stop laughing, you fucker, help me find my shoe.** _

_ **Yes, you ** _ **_do_ _know which one it is._**

** _The black leather one, you daft git._ **

** _No, not that one._ **

** _Fuck's sake, Nathan, this isn't funny._ **

** _For shit's sake, stop laughing._ **

** _We're going to be so late._ **

** _No, I will not wear my trainers._ **

** _Why?_ **

** _Because this is a fucking funeral, not a trip to Romford Shopping Centre._ **

** _Yes, we do need to go to the Asda there to return my shirt, but that's not the point._ **

** _Nathan, you shit, give me back my tie._ **

** _Now I've lost two things._ **

** _No, don't you fucking dare._ **

** _Nathan, no._ **

** _No._ **

** _Nathan, you prick, not in the fucking fish tank._ **

** _Fuck's sake._ **

** _Wanker._ **

** _Now I need a new tie._ **

** _Wait here._ **

** _Where the shit are my other ties._ **

** _Nathan, do you know where the ties are?_ **

** _No, not the festive ones._ **

** _The other ones._ **

** _What do you mean "which ones"?_ **

** _The other fucking ties we own._ **

** _I'll find them myself, then._ **

** _Here they are._ **

** _Found them._ **

** _Thank you for your expert help._ **

** _Pranny._ **

** _Now, where is that shoe._ **

** _Nathan, tell me where it is._ **

** _Wait._ **

** _You didn't._ **

** _Nathan, you cock-face._ **

** _In the fucking shed._ **

** _Who hides a shoe in a fucking shed?_ **

** _Well, obviously I couldn't find it, could I?_ **

** _Dick._ **

** _Time to retrieve the shoe._ **

** _Then go the the funeral._ **

** _Yes._ **

** _Here is the shoe._ **

** _Well, thank you Nathan._ **

** _What's the time?_ **

** _Really?_ **

** _Fuck._ **

** _We are so late._ **

** _Nathan._ **

** _You're a dick._ **


End file.
